She Trusted Her Gut

Let me tell you about my friend and her son Andre.

For two months, she was told he had colic.

He was eating, so that felt reassuring. But something was off. He was taking in a lot of air when he nursed. Bottles were a struggle. They went through pacifier after pacifier trying to find one he could manage. Nothing clicked. Nothing settled him.

And that word kept coming back: colic.

She kept showing up. Kept trying things. And listen… this wasn't a first-time mom second-guessing herself. She was a seasoned mother. She knew babies. She knew the difference between normal fussy and something isn't right. And she kept feeling that quiet, persistent whisper that said …we haven't found it yet.

She finally saw a chiropractor. And that chiropractor pointed her in a direction nobody else had: a pediatric dentist. The dentist identified a posterior tongue tie, and here is the thing I want you to really hear: Andre didn't have the classic symptoms. No clicking sound while nursing. None of the textbook signs most of us read about on Google at 3am. His presentation was subtle. Which is exactly why it took two months to find.

The dentist released the tie. And then my friend spent the rest of her entire maternity leave doing oral therapy and chiropractic work with Andre.

Night and day. That's how she describes it. Night and day.

I think about Andre's story now that I'm a doula. Because posterior tongue ties are sneaky in a way that anterior ties aren't. They hide. And because they hide, the symptoms can be easy to miss or easy to chalk up to something else…a fussy baby, a gassy baby, a baby who just needs to adjust.

Sometimes that's true. And sometimes there's a posterior tongue tie that nobody's looked for yet.

Here's what I want every parent to take from this:

Your baby doesn't have to check every box on the symptom list for something to be wrong. Andre didn't click. He still had a tie. Babies are individuals. Their presentations are individual. And if your gut is telling you that you haven't found the answer yet… you are allowed to keep looking.

You can love and trust your care team completely AND ask for another set of eyes. Those things coexist. Pediatricians are remarkable; they catch things we'd never catch on our own. And sometimes the answer lives with a specialist in a different lane entirely. A pediatric dentist who focuses on tethered oral tissues. An IBCLC or infant feeding specialist. A chiropractor trained in pediatric care.

If your baby is struggling to feed, going through pacifiers like they're a subscription service, gassy and uncomfortable and just not quite right…it's worth asking. Even if they're still eating. Even if they don't have the click. Even if someone has already given you an answer that doesn't quite sit right.

Keep asking. Keep advocating. You are not being difficult. You are being Andre's mom.

And Andre is thriving.

Tell me your story in the comments. These are the conversations that change things!!

Molly Green is a labor and postpartum doula and founder of Beyond Birthing Associates. She believes informed mothers are empowered mothers — and that the best thing we can do for each other is share what we know. Find her at beyondbirthingassociates.com.